Are you peeing "green"

Sheryl Crow…when I think of her I automatically think of “all I wana do is have some fun!” Although, today all she wants to do (with the help of lib freak Laurie David) is ruin American’s lives!

Crow is joining the long list of celebrities and politicians from John “$400 haircut” Edwards to Gwyneth “Americans are stupid” Paltrow who talk about their two America’s and the ozone layer burning with a growing hole in the sky but still own their large homes, go on tours with huge buses and SUVs, take private planes, and more! Do you think they only shop at all organic places? And no, we’re not talking Whole Foods and Trader Joe’s. Those places export from other places so hard core environmentalists like a NY family featured in the NY Times a couple of months ago ONLY buy food from the surrounding area so as not to use too much energy and pollution that can hurt the earth. They might be freaks but at least these people aren’t hypocrites.

Now Miss (or should I say Ms. because without a doubt she’s a feminist too) Crow is telling Americans they can limit how much TOILET PAPER they use when going…well, you know. Seriously (not trying to sound too much like a Grey’s Anatomy actor) but, seriously?!?!?! I do NOT want to get into what we all go through when we…go, but come on people! Do you think you could use just one square? No Quilted Northern, Charmin, or Scott toilet paper will do the trick with one sheet or square or whatever you want to call it!

Needless to say I am glad Lance is no longer with her – he and I might have our political differences (no, I don’t personally know him) but he is a great American (to steal a line from my boss) and deserves so much better then a 40 yr. old-braless-died hair-bus riding-private plane flying-American bashing-feminist singer. I mean, who wants to hook up with someone who only goes through a roll of toilet paper a yr (maybe more). This is if she gets the 400 sheet roll.

Now go soak up some sun everyone! J

EB-


I totally agree E! I know we all love Sheryl, especially with grate advice like, “I think war is never the answer to solving any problems. The best way to solve problems is to not have enemies.” The Toilet paper rationing is just ridiculous. One square… one square... has anyone ever tried to use one square? Oh but thanks for budging on those “pesky situations” and giving us 2-3 squares.. yeah, that’s a big help!
Let’s take a look at some more practical things that you can do Sheryl, hey I have a great idea, let’s band together to fight global warming and have everyone DRIVE out to a concert. I hope these are acoustic concerts, how much energy are these concerts costing us. Are you asking everyone to ride bikes to these huge concerts you are throwing to raise awareness for global warming? But I guess we can always buy some carbon offsets! Are they going to be selling Toilet Paper offsets too? I’m sure there are some people our there that can spare a square!

Do I even get into the clothing line idea?

“I have designed a clothing line that has what's called a "dining sleeve". The sleeve is detachable and can be replaced with another "dining sleeve," after usage. The design will offer the "diner" the convenience of wiping his mouth on his sleeve rather than throwing out yet another barely used paper product.. I think this idea could also translate quite well to those suffering with an annoying head cold.”

That is just SICK! Do we really want to be sitting next to people at restaurants that are wiping there mouths on their sleeves, what are we toddlers? Should we just carry around bibs? Let’s just think ahead for a minute. Are we not going to be using more energy and detergent to wash our sleeves after using them? Did she say that this would be good for people with head colds too? So basically we are going to be walking around with snotty, food stained sleeves, is this what the world is coming to?

Socialist unite and please tell us how much toilet paper we can use, the general public is too dumb to regulate these things ourselves. If you leave us to decide how much toilet paper we need we will just abuse our toilet paper pillages.

ER-